New Rule -- Eat More / Weigh Less!

Lately my weight loss has stalled.  I'm eating EXACTLY how I'm supposed to.  I'm working out as hard as I can.  What could I be doing wrong?

Well... according to Adam, I may not be eating ENOUGH!  This is VERY difficult for me to wrap my brain around, but since he's the one who got me THIS far, I'm going to go ahead and trust his advice.

So... the new rule is, "If you're hungry--EAT!" 

I got home from working out a little while ago and I was starving (I was actually hungry when I got there).  I had some onion dip that I made with Greek yogurt, so I had that with some celery and carrot sticks.  This was a good, high-protein, low-calorie snack with about 160 calories.  Mmmmm... I can practically feel the fat melting away!

Stay tuned, everyone!

The Universe is Cheering Me On!!

The other day I had something really nice happen to me, and Adam said that it was the universe cheering me on toward my goal.  I seriously believe in that kind of thing, but today something happened that totally confirmed it.

I went for my usual 12-mile walk at the greenway, and was struggling to add some running into the mix.  I was about 2 miles from the end of the course when I started mentally beating myself up.  I said to myself, "Why can't I motivate myself to run?  If Adam were here, he would be able to push me to do it--why can't I do that myself?  I really need to get inspired to run again."

Just when I was certain that I would walk the rest of the course, a total stranger walked up to me and said, "Are you up for a little running?  You DO run, don't you?"  I told her that I DO run, but that I've been recovering from a knee injury and have been trying to add running back into my program.  So... we started running and chatting as we did.  Turns out, she was visiting from out of town and was out getting her run in as she is training for a marathon in a couple of weeks.  We ran the last 1-1/2 miles together and then walked it out a little to cool down.  Even though I'm sure she was going slow for me it was all I could do to keep up with her pace, but it felt SO good to push myself. 

I'm not sure if this lady (her name is Tara) was an angel of fitness, one of Adam's secret spies, or a total figment of my imagination, but she appeared out of nowhere just when I needed her!

Adam is right--the universe IS cheering me on!  Now I just need to answer that call and keep pressing forward!

The Power of Positive Thinking

My friend and fellow Fitness Together client, Mitch, posted something on my facebook today that really made me feel good:

I still remember the very first time I saw you and thinking "she wont last." Did you prove me totally wrong!!!!! Keep it up Girl!! you look fantastic!!!! You are disappearing in front of us!!

While, in a way, this is not very complimentary, since I have actually "lasted" despite his gut instincts, it actually is a testament to my achievement.

What I told Mitch is that there were plenty of times that even I didn't think that I would last, so it feels really good to have come this far.

So... how did I manage to "last"?  Well, I guess it's because at any given time there was at least ONE person who thought I could do it.  Sometimes that person was me, but lots of times, even when I had given up on myself, the one person who believed (or KNEW) I could do it was Adam.  Other times, it was my husband or my son...everyone has supported me and helped me get this far.

This last part is hard and it seems like I'm scraping and scratching for every pound, but I know I can do it!  THAT is the power of positive thinking!

Good Friends Love You No Matter What!

I have a very good friend...a young man the same age as my son... who recently moved away from Charlotte.  I sent him an email and told him to read this blog if he had some extra time.  His response truly warmed my heart:

Wow

Just read your blog……not all of it…….its too long, but the first few that come up………..wow. I really didn’t know all that.

Normally I don’t read blogs and I certainly don’t write them, but this being you and seeing how important you are in my life, I couldn’t help but read.

I am so happy you have found your way and made a new life for yourself and your family (real and self imposed included ).

Is that picture really up to date m2 ? The one on the trail? That is crazy :).

You should know though that even though I am happy and ecstatic for your journey and victory my love for you as a friend, mentor, co-worker and mom was always the same, because you are always you no matter what your physical state was or is :)!

I hope though that you finally feel as good outside as you should feel about yourself inside!

XOXOXO your best son

There are many people in my life who have loved me no matter what I looked like or how miserable I was.  These are my TRUE friends and family!  I love you ALL!!

How It All Began!

A lot of people ask me how I got started on this weight loss and fitness journey, so I thought I would write it down here for everyone to see AND to remind myself from whence I came!

I suppose the beginning of the end of my life as a fat person began in October of 2008.  I was in Las Vegas for and NHRA drag race event and had brought my son, Ken, with me to help with the race and to spend a couple of extra days afterward for a mother-son vacation.

Working the race was exhausting and I was glad to have Ken there with me to do the "heavy lifting" and to help run around and get things done.  I was too fat and tired to do much, so I mostly took care of business by directing things from the hospitality hauler.  After the event was over, Ken and I continued our vacation and did all the usual tourist stuff.  One night, we went to the top of the Stratosphere to ride the insanely scary rides that are on the top.  I was SO fat, that I almost didn't fit in one of them... they had to get two people to jump on the lap bar to get it to latch!  During the day, we walked around and saw the sights, but because of my weight, my back would get terrible spasms, and I would have to rest.

We had a really good time in Las Vegas, but once I got home, the reality of being fat and out of shape took me right back to my usual depressed self.  The more depressed I was, the more I wanted to eat and the less I wanted to do.  I basically worked during the day so that I could come home, hold down the couch, watch TV, and EAT myself into a coma.  That is what I did... I ate to forget about everything else that I was experiencing.  Lonely?  Eat.  Sad?  Eat.  Worried?  Eat.  Tired?  Eat.  Mad?  Definitely eat!  That was the vicious cycle that I was in.

Then, one day, I was watching TV and saw the show "Big Medicine," which is about a father-son team who are bariatric surgeons.  Most of their patients are there to get gastric bypass surgery.  This sounded like the last chance procedure that might finally help me escape my fat girl hell.  So... I started learning all I could about the various procedures.  I watched anything I could find on TV on the subject, read articles in magazines and newspapers, and did a LOT of research on the Internet.  After a lot of investigating, I found a very qualified surgeon in Charlotte and signed up to go to one of his seminars to learn more.  As the day of the seminar got closer, I was both nervous and excited.  I knew that such a procedure can be risky and I also had some doubt in the back of my mind about my potential success.  You see, I had been successful on other diet programs-especially Weight Watchers.  3 years prior, I had gone from 285 to about 215 with the program, but gave up when I hit a pretty serious plateau.  With my new job in marketing and all the travel it involved, I had just the excuse I "needed" to gain back most of the weight I had lost.  By this time I was all the way back up to 268.5 pounds!

The day of the seminar, something came up at work and I couldn't get out of the office on time:  I ended up missing that seminar.  Sometime before I had a chance to reschedule, 2 things happened:

1. I saw a program where Carnie Wilson spoke about how she had had the gastric bypass surgery, but ended up gaining all of her weight back.  I thought, "If someone with this much money and fame can have the surgery but end up right back where she started, it could certainly happen to me."  I began to think that if I didn't fix the problem (i.e. my addiction to food and my tendency to use it as a crutch), having the surgery would not be a permanent cure.  I didn't want to alter my body in such a way that I could never eat like a "normal" person again only to have the results be less than optimal! 
   
   
   
   
   
   
2. I received a direct mail piece from a training facility called "Fitness Together."  The postcard showed a lady who had lost 110 pounds through diet and exercise.  I thought, "I've had success with food programs before... maybe if I combined that with the accountability of a personal trainer, I could conquer this once and for all.

I knew that such a program would be expensive, and I figured that my husband, Shin, was probably tired of me spending money, trying new programs, and then failing.  Here's a sample of all the things that I've tried:

• Weight Watchers (4 different times)
• Fen-Phen
• Jenny Craig
• Hollywood Diet
• Nutri/System
• eDiets
• The Best Life Diet

Through all this craziness, Shin put up with the cost and the lifestyle changes, so I really felt guilty asking him to go through it with me yet again.  But... he told me that he loved me, and if I wanted to try this Fitness Together thing, he would support me.  So, I called, made an appointment for my free training session, and that's how my journey began.

In the beginning, I worked with various trainers at the studio until I finally settled into a schedule with my main man, Adam!  He has been the perfect partner in this journey and has seriously whipped me into shape.  I don't know how I could have done this without him.  24.5 pounds to go... THIS time I'm going to make it all the way!

Stay tuned...

I'm a lightweight!

When Shin and I got married over 30 years ago, I probably weighed about the same as I do now, but he was SUPER skinny and weighed less than me.  He has since gained about 40 pounds (mostly muscle), but until recently I was about 100 pounds over my wedding weight (yikes)!  So... what I'm trying to say is that in our married life, I have never weighed less than Shin (even though he's about 4 inches taller than me).

The other member of my family, Ken, was born when I was 22, and I have ALWAYS weighed more than him.

[INSERT DRUM ROLL HERE]

UNTIL NOW!!!

I have lost over 95 pounds and I am the lightest person in my family!  Yay!

Yes... I weigh less than Shin!  AND... I weigh less than Ken!  I am officially the lightweight of the family!!

I still need to lose 25 more pounds, but it is SO cool to be the smallest person in the house for a change.  It's so much fun to try to borrow shirts from Ken and have him say, "I don't have anything small enough for you!" 

For someone who was having to wear a men's 3X, it is just unbelievable to me that I now wear a small!

I LOVE my new body!!!  Woo-hoo!

The Devil is EVERYWHERE!

Today I am in a panic because I am tired of being perfect all the time and it is weakening my resolve.  I see the devil everywhere I look.

Beautiful Day at Julian Price Park, near Blowing Rock, NC

What has changed since I've lost all this weight?  Well... pretty much EVERYTHING!

However, I would have to say that the biggest change is my ability to lead an active life and keep up with Shin and Ken in whatever physical activity we might like to enjoy.  Today was a fantastic day... walking the Boone Fork Trail at Julian Price Park was just the right challenge for me.  It was such a nice day and the scenery and companionship was so great that I mostly forgot about my injured knee.  There isn't a LOT of climbing on this trail, but it is challenging with tons of roots, trees, rocks, streams, etc. to maneuver.  Especially challenging were the multiple times that we had to cross the stream/brook that the trail follows.  In some places, I really had to step out of my comfort zone to jump over water or walk across some shaky logs.  In the beginning, I was pretty much relying on Shin and Ken to lend me a hand and help me across, but towards the end I was gaining confidence in what my body can do and was maneuvering the obstacles by myself. 

I guess having this new body is kind of like going from driving an old pickup truck

                                                                                                            

                                                            

to sitting behind the wheel of a Ferrari -- I just don't know how much I can step on the gas and how well the brakes are going to work, but I'm slowly figuring it out.  And, just like driving a Ferrari--it's a LOT of fun!

Life is GOOD!!

Size DOES matter!

When I started this journey, I was a whopping size 24!

Now I'm a size 12!  I guess that means I'm half the size I used to be?

God, these last 25 pounds are killing me -- but I will persevere!!